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« Reply #30 on: October 10, 2019, 12:57:43 AM »

I made this topic a while back but no one posted.

I think that I'm alright for now.
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somebody didn't take their meds today
Speedo is owned by Ode
hello I have time to upload my balls
Colonel Kori hired Pete and South America to clean Louis.
This year, North Korea has attacked the old dog
I love your Oven
The man who is green, matures without warming up and is already full of money.
it looks like all these posts were created by hippies
My belly is my ticklish spot too
If being good-looking/attractive to girls was a crime, I'd be a law-abiding citizen.
Get in my signature
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in few minutes, i will end making my new sexy FC
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They need to hire new civilians and fire the old ones
This time the dog wakes up!
I don't believe he's in my bottom
What a pity about those nuts
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« Reply #31 on: October 10, 2019, 01:59:31 PM »

I have autism. I have had it for all my life, as far as I know.

I'm not good at social stuff, and had to manually learn what others all seem to instinctively know. I also can't focus well on anything if I've forgotten my medication, which is really annoying because it basically means I can't really do anything useful or fun for the whole day. You might see me here sometimes venting my frustration over that, if it happens again. Or you might see me just be really weird, because that also happens when I forget my medication.

Perhaps to balance it out, I seem to have heightened school abilities. I hardly study at all and still I get ridiculously high notes in everything, which also has me really worried I'll fail when I get to university because I never learned to study. Planning skills are another thing I'm really, really bad at because of my autism, so yeah, I'm pretty worried about that.

It's not the end of the world, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a normal conversation without having to constantly analyze body language, tone of voice and choice of words to try to figure out the exact nuance of meaning the other person wants to convey, or to precisely regulate my own tone of voice, body language and word choice so I'm not misunderstood and I don't offend anyone.

Those things, which you all probably do without even thinking about it, are a conscious effort for me. That is partly why I prefer the forum over actual human contact, I think. Communicating through text eliminates the need to check body language and tone of voice.

I still misinterpret a lot of things, though. So if you see a reply by me that doesn't seem to make any sense, chances are I either forgot my medication, or I just misinterpreted the original post completely.

Oh, and sorry for making this such a giant story. I guess I just had a lot to talk about.
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« Reply #32 on: October 10, 2019, 02:49:16 PM »

I have autism. I have had it for all my life, as far as I know.

I'm not good at social stuff, and had to manually learn what others all seem to instinctively know. I also can't focus well on anything if I've forgotten my medication, which is really annoying because it basically means I can't really do anything useful or fun for the whole day. You might see me here sometimes venting my frustration over that, if it happens again. Or you might see me just be really weird, because that also happens when I forget my medication.

Perhaps to balance it out, I seem to have heightened school abilities. I hardly study at all and still I get ridiculously high notes in everything, which also has me really worried I'll fail when I get to university because I never learned to study. Planning skills are another thing I'm really, really bad at because of my autism, so yeah, I'm pretty worried about that.

It's not the end of the world, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a normal conversation without having to constantly analyze body language, tone of voice and choice of words to try to figure out the exact nuance of meaning the other person wants to convey, or to precisely regulate my own tone of voice, body language and word choice so I'm not misunderstood and I don't offend anyone.

Those things, which you all probably do without even thinking about it, are a conscious effort for me. That is partly why I prefer the forum over actual human contact, I think. Communicating through text eliminates the need to check body language and tone of voice.

I still misinterpret a lot of things, though. So if you see a reply by me that doesn't seem to make any sense, chances are I either forgot my medication, or I just misinterpreted the original post completely.

Oh, and sorry for making this such a giant story. I guess I just had a lot to talk about.
Brother E: I never knew you had autism until you told me one time. It's hard to tell because you communicate so well and you are so smart. Especially with your mysteries  Smiley
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« Reply #33 on: October 10, 2019, 03:06:42 PM »

Brother E: I never knew you had autism until you told me one time. It's hard to tell because you communicate so well and you are so smart. Especially with your mysteries  Smiley
Thanks! Yeah, not all people with autism are alike. My autism is relatively mild, but still very much present. I also learned how to cope with it over the years. Good to know my efforts to learn how to communicate better are paying off!
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« Reply #34 on: October 10, 2019, 03:08:51 PM »

Thanks! Yeah, not all people with autism are alike. My autism is relatively mild, but still very much present. I also learned how to cope with it over the years. Good to know my efforts to learn how to communicate better are paying off!
Brother E: They sure are! It's easy to role-play with you. Smiley
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« Reply #35 on: October 10, 2019, 03:17:26 PM »

Brother E: They sure are! It's easy to role-play with you. Smiley
Well, it's a lot easier than talking in real life, because I can take the time to make sure what I'm saying comes out right, whereas if I try that in real life, people get annoyed at me not responding fast enough. I know, I've tried.
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« Reply #36 on: October 10, 2019, 04:51:20 PM »

Well, it's a lot easier than talking in real life, because I can take the time to make sure what I'm saying comes out right, whereas if I try that in real life, people get annoyed at me not responding fast enough. I know, I've tried.
Brother E: Oh. Still,  I bet you are doing better than what you were. Wink
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« Reply #37 on: October 10, 2019, 11:00:30 PM »

I have autism. I have had it for all my life, as far as I know.

I'm not good at social stuff, and had to manually learn what others all seem to instinctively know. I also can't focus well on anything if I've forgotten my medication, which is really annoying because it basically means I can't really do anything useful or fun for the whole day. You might see me here sometimes venting my frustration over that, if it happens again. Or you might see me just be really weird, because that also happens when I forget my medication.

Perhaps to balance it out, I seem to have heightened school abilities. I hardly study at all and still I get ridiculously high notes in everything, which also has me really worried I'll fail when I get to university because I never learned to study. Planning skills are another thing I'm really, really bad at because of my autism, so yeah, I'm pretty worried about that.

It's not the end of the world, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a normal conversation without having to constantly analyze body language, tone of voice and choice of words to try to figure out the exact nuance of meaning the other person wants to convey, or to precisely regulate my own tone of voice, body language and word choice so I'm not misunderstood and I don't offend anyone.

Those things, which you all probably do without even thinking about it, are a conscious effort for me. That is partly why I prefer the forum over actual human contact, I think. Communicating through text eliminates the need to check body language and tone of voice.

I still misinterpret a lot of things, though. So if you see a reply by me that doesn't seem to make any sense, chances are I either forgot my medication, or I just misinterpreted the original post completely.

Oh, and sorry for making this such a giant story. I guess I just had a lot to talk about.
I have such a classmate (now at home schooling), he also had autism. My friend and I tried to talk to him, then he went somewhere, and he didn’t say anything, didn’t even pay attention, he just went where he needed to.
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« Reply #38 on: October 17, 2019, 01:09:35 PM »

I have such a classmate (now at home schooling), he also had autism. My friend and I tried to talk to him, then he went somewhere, and he didn’t say anything, didn’t even pay attention, he just went where he needed to.
Some kids that have autistism are non verbal. My school has a program where you can sign up for a class to go down to the class and be a role model to them. I signed up and its actually really cool. You learn a lot and get to go on field trips with them. Its a lot more casual then you would of thought. I remember the first day being so scared but by the end of the first week you are like "why was I nervous?". And a lot of this goes with stereotyping. They do have moments but its just what is expected. Nobody's perfect. But just saying, I hope that we can break the mold and get more attention with mental disabilities. I had depression. I know what mental illness can do to you.
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« Reply #39 on: November 03, 2019, 10:06:18 AM »

Sometimes, my family tells me that I need a professional for mental help every time I argue/fight with them, whether it would be verbally or physically. I always tell them that I need no mental help whatsoever and everything is fine within me. Nothing is wrong with me mentally and physically. Instead, I suggest them to do that for themselves. I usually try to break into the kitchen, the living room, and each of my family members' rooms, so I can throw away the stuff inside those rooms and break them completely. Whenever I try to do this, they always yell at me and threaten me by saying that they will call the police and put me in jail. I always tell them, "Call them. I don't care." I was inspired by many of the shocks, sufferings, and tragedies going on in this world for years and always thought that I could genuinely and definitely do something like those one day. I always had thoughts about ruining and destroying the entire world, but I rarely get the chance to tell in public about it, because they takes things way too seriously and that will get me in "trouble". I always had thoughts about the entire population to disappear from this world and me being the only person to remain alive and the ways on how I can make the entire population disappear. I get angry for almost everything, no matter how big or small they are. I view my family as strangers and not a "true" family (there is no such thing), because I definitely want to leave the house, but there is no way for me to do it. I never genuinely liked them and they always forced me to do certain things I don't want to do. I never did a favor for them and whenever they try to do favors for me, they always do favors that I never asked for and beg them to do nothing about it. I never thank them when they do favors to me and they always find it disrespectful for some reason. I never apologize for things I do against them, either. I don't find either situation disrespectful at all. They always complain about me being lazy and how I don't take care of my room and hygiene. They believe I'm lying every time they ask me something, how I hide many things from them, how I "steal" their mails without even doing so, and they yell at me for not cutting the grass, not doing breakfast and lunch on my own, not carrying things for them, such as things they bought from the store, and how I can't even get a job in the first place. They even blamed at me for breaking the computer intentionally, which is wrong. I turned the computer on and "Automatic Repair" showed up. That's it. They even told me to leave the house, but whenever I do that, they tell me "What are you doing?! Where are you?!?!?! Come back home now!!!!!" I stand outside for hours, turn my phone off so they won't call me, and come back after they leave the house for shopping or whatever. This makes no sense. They also tell how I was better when I was a lot younger than now, which isn't true. I always behaved like this and kept thoughts about behaving like this for years. I also speak to myself at home every day and this occurred ever since I was born. I don't do this in public and whenever I do it at home, my family always asks me "to whom I am talking to?" I always interrupt whenever they ask me this or whenever they come nearby me. Then I keep doing this after they leave me alone. Not only I talk to myself, I talk as in I'm talking to someone else and remain my focus on that, usually when I walk around my room, which is a complete mess, but I personally don't care about anything that's happening in my family anymore. In fact, I never did.
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« Reply #40 on: November 03, 2019, 10:12:09 AM »

I feel bad for you tbh. I appreciate you might not want pity or sympathy so I'm not giving it to you. It's a shame you have to live with this.
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Favourite Holidays:
Cupcakeria: Baseball Season
Pastaria: Gondola 500
Donuteria: Maple Mornings
Cheeseria: Maple Mornings
Cupcakeria To Go: Comet Con
Cupcakeria HD: Maple Mornings
Bakeria: Groovstock
Taco Mia HD: Maple Mornings
Sushiria: Maple Mornings
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Out of Context Quotes:
somebody didn't take their meds today
Speedo is owned by Ode
hello I have time to upload my balls
Colonel Kori hired Pete and South America to clean Louis.
This year, North Korea has attacked the old dog
I love your Oven
The man who is green, matures without warming up and is already full of money.
it looks like all these posts were created by hippies
My belly is my ticklish spot too
If being good-looking/attractive to girls was a crime, I'd be a law-abiding citizen.
Get in my signature
Remove excessive foreign languages
in few minutes, i will end making my new sexy FC
Virgil van Dick.
They need to hire new civilians and fire the old ones
This time the dog wakes up!
I don't believe he's in my bottom
What a pity about those nuts
College:
10 weeks down, 24 weeks to go.
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« Reply #41 on: November 03, 2019, 10:14:11 AM »

Sometimes, my family tells me that I need a professional for mental help every time I argue/fight with them, whether it would be verbally or physically. I always tell them that I need no mental help whatsoever and everything is fine within me. Nothing is wrong with me mentally and physically. Instead, I suggest them to do that for themselves. I usually try to break into the kitchen, the living room, and each of my family members' rooms, so I can throw away the stuff inside those rooms and break them completely. Whenever I try to do this, they always yell at me and threaten me by saying that they will call the police and put me in jail. I always tell them, "Call them. I don't care." I was inspired by many of the shocks, sufferings, and tragedies going on in this world for years and always thought that I could genuinely and definitely do something like those one day. I always had thoughts about ruining and destroying the entire world, but I rarely get the chance to tell in public about it, because they takes things way too seriously and that will get me in "trouble". I always had thoughts about the entire population to disappear from this world and me being the only person to remain alive and the ways on how I can make the entire population disappear. I get angry for almost everything, no matter how big or small they are. I view my family as strangers and not a "true" family (there is no such thing), because I definitely want to leave the house, but there is no way for me to do it. I never genuinely liked them and they always forced me to do certain things I don't want to do. I never did a favor for them and whenever they try to do favors for me, they always do favors that I never asked for and beg them to do nothing about it. I never thank them when they do favors to me and they always find it disrespectful for some reason. I never apologize for things I do against them, either. I don't find either situation disrespectful at all. They always complain about me being lazy and how I don't take care of my room and hygiene. They believe I'm lying every time they ask me something, how I hide many things from them, how I "steal" their mails without even doing so, and they yell at me for not cutting the grass, not doing breakfast and lunch on my own, not carrying things for them, such as things they bought from the store, and how I can't even get a job in the first place. They even blamed at me for breaking the computer intentionally, which is wrong. I turned the computer on and "Automatic Repair" showed up. That's it. They even told me to leave the house, but whenever I do that, they tell me "What are you doing?! Where are you?!?!?! Come back home now!!!!!" I stand outside for hours, turn my phone off so they won't call me, and come back after they leave the house for shopping or whatever. This makes no sense. They also tell how I was better when I was a lot younger than now, which isn't true. I always behaved like this and kept thoughts about behaving like this for years. I also speak to myself at home every day and this occurred ever since I was born. I don't do this in public and whenever I do it at home, my family always asks me "to whom I am talking to?" I always interrupt whenever they ask me this or whenever they come nearby me. Then I keep doing this after they leave me alone. Not only I talk to myself, I talk as in I'm talking to someone else and remain my focus on that, usually when I walk around my room, which is a complete mess, but I personally don't care about anything that's happening in my family anymore. In fact, I never did.
That sucks. I don't want this to sound mean, but if this is real then I think you need help with your mental problems Hmm
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« Reply #42 on: November 03, 2019, 01:24:08 PM »

Sometimes, my family tells me that I need a professional for mental help every time I argue/fight with them, whether it would be verbally or physically. I always tell them that I need no mental help whatsoever and everything is fine within me. Nothing is wrong with me mentally and physically. Instead, I suggest them to do that for themselves. I usually try to break into the kitchen, the living room, and each of my family members' rooms, so I can throw away the stuff inside those rooms and break them completely. Whenever I try to do this, they always yell at me and threaten me by saying that they will call the police and put me in jail. I always tell them, "Call them. I don't care." I was inspired by many of the shocks, sufferings, and tragedies going on in this world for years and always thought that I could genuinely and definitely do something like those one day. I always had thoughts about ruining and destroying the entire world, but I rarely get the chance to tell in public about it, because they takes things way too seriously and that will get me in "trouble". I always had thoughts about the entire population to disappear from this world and me being the only person to remain alive and the ways on how I can make the entire population disappear. I get angry for almost everything, no matter how big or small they are. I view my family as strangers and not a "true" family (there is no such thing), because I definitely want to leave the house, but there is no way for me to do it. I never genuinely liked them and they always forced me to do certain things I don't want to do. I never did a favor for them and whenever they try to do favors for me, they always do favors that I never asked for and beg them to do nothing about it. I never thank them when they do favors to me and they always find it disrespectful for some reason. I never apologize for things I do against them, either. I don't find either situation disrespectful at all. They always complain about me being lazy and how I don't take care of my room and hygiene. They believe I'm lying every time they ask me something, how I hide many things from them, how I "steal" their mails without even doing so, and they yell at me for not cutting the grass, not doing breakfast and lunch on my own, not carrying things for them, such as things they bought from the store, and how I can't even get a job in the first place. They even blamed at me for breaking the computer intentionally, which is wrong. I turned the computer on and "Automatic Repair" showed up. That's it. They even told me to leave the house, but whenever I do that, they tell me "What are you doing?! Where are you?!?!?! Come back home now!!!!!" I stand outside for hours, turn my phone off so they won't call me, and come back after they leave the house for shopping or whatever. This makes no sense. They also tell how I was better when I was a lot younger than now, which isn't true. I always behaved like this and kept thoughts about behaving like this for years. I also speak to myself at home every day and this occurred ever since I was born. I don't do this in public and whenever I do it at home, my family always asks me "to whom I am talking to?" I always interrupt whenever they ask me this or whenever they come nearby me. Then I keep doing this after they leave me alone. Not only I talk to myself, I talk as in I'm talking to someone else and remain my focus on that, usually when I walk around my room, which is a complete mess, but I personally don't care about anything that's happening in my family anymore. In fact, I never did.

 Sad
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« Reply #43 on: November 03, 2019, 02:00:15 PM »

Sometimes, my family tells me that I need a professional for mental help every time I argue/fight with them, whether it would be verbally or physically. I always tell them that I need no mental help whatsoever and everything is fine within me. Nothing is wrong with me mentally and physically. Instead, I suggest them to do that for themselves. I usually try to break into the kitchen, the living room, and each of my family members' rooms, so I can throw away the stuff inside those rooms and break them completely. Whenever I try to do this, they always yell at me and threaten me by saying that they will call the police and put me in jail. I always tell them, "Call them. I don't care." I was inspired by many of the shocks, sufferings, and tragedies going on in this world for years and always thought that I could genuinely and definitely do something like those one day. I always had thoughts about ruining and destroying the entire world, but I rarely get the chance to tell in public about it, because they takes things way too seriously and that will get me in "trouble". I always had thoughts about the entire population to disappear from this world and me being the only person to remain alive and the ways on how I can make the entire population disappear. I get angry for almost everything, no matter how big or small they are. I view my family as strangers and not a "true" family (there is no such thing), because I definitely want to leave the house, but there is no way for me to do it. I never genuinely liked them and they always forced me to do certain things I don't want to do. I never did a favor for them and whenever they try to do favors for me, they always do favors that I never asked for and beg them to do nothing about it. I never thank them when they do favors to me and they always find it disrespectful for some reason. I never apologize for things I do against them, either. I don't find either situation disrespectful at all. They always complain about me being lazy and how I don't take care of my room and hygiene. They believe I'm lying every time they ask me something, how I hide many things from them, how I "steal" their mails without even doing so, and they yell at me for not cutting the grass, not doing breakfast and lunch on my own, not carrying things for them, such as things they bought from the store, and how I can't even get a job in the first place. They even blamed at me for breaking the computer intentionally, which is wrong. I turned the computer on and "Automatic Repair" showed up. That's it. They even told me to leave the house, but whenever I do that, they tell me "What are you doing?! Where are you?!?!?! Come back home now!!!!!" I stand outside for hours, turn my phone off so they won't call me, and come back after they leave the house for shopping or whatever. This makes no sense. They also tell how I was better when I was a lot younger than now, which isn't true. I always behaved like this and kept thoughts about behaving like this for years. I also speak to myself at home every day and this occurred ever since I was born. I don't do this in public and whenever I do it at home, my family always asks me "to whom I am talking to?" I always interrupt whenever they ask me this or whenever they come nearby me. Then I keep doing this after they leave me alone. Not only I talk to myself, I talk as in I'm talking to someone else and remain my focus on that, usually when I walk around my room, which is a complete mess, but I personally don't care about anything that's happening in my family anymore. In fact, I never did.
That sucks. Maybe try standing up for yourself and try to get some independence.
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« Reply #44 on: November 04, 2019, 07:17:03 AM »

Sometimes, my family tells me that I need a professional for mental help every time I argue/fight with them, whether it would be verbally or physically. I always tell them that I need no mental help whatsoever and everything is fine within me. Nothing is wrong with me mentally and physically. Instead, I suggest them to do that for themselves. I usually try to break into the kitchen, the living room, and each of my family members' rooms, so I can throw away the stuff inside those rooms and break them completely. Whenever I try to do this, they always yell at me and threaten me by saying that they will call the police and put me in jail. I always tell them, "Call them. I don't care." I was inspired by many of the shocks, sufferings, and tragedies going on in this world for years and always thought that I could genuinely and definitely do something like those one day. I always had thoughts about ruining and destroying the entire world, but I rarely get the chance to tell in public about it, because they takes things way too seriously and that will get me in "trouble". I always had thoughts about the entire population to disappear from this world and me being the only person to remain alive and the ways on how I can make the entire population disappear. I get angry for almost everything, no matter how big or small they are. I view my family as strangers and not a "true" family (there is no such thing), because I definitely want to leave the house, but there is no way for me to do it. I never genuinely liked them and they always forced me to do certain things I don't want to do. I never did a favor for them and whenever they try to do favors for me, they always do favors that I never asked for and beg them to do nothing about it. I never thank them when they do favors to me and they always find it disrespectful for some reason. I never apologize for things I do against them, either. I don't find either situation disrespectful at all. They always complain about me being lazy and how I don't take care of my room and hygiene. They believe I'm lying every time they ask me something, how I hide many things from them, how I "steal" their mails without even doing so, and they yell at me for not cutting the grass, not doing breakfast and lunch on my own, not carrying things for them, such as things they bought from the store, and how I can't even get a job in the first place. They even blamed at me for breaking the computer intentionally, which is wrong. I turned the computer on and "Automatic Repair" showed up. That's it. They even told me to leave the house, but whenever I do that, they tell me "What are you doing?! Where are you?!?!?! Come back home now!!!!!" I stand outside for hours, turn my phone off so they won't call me, and come back after they leave the house for shopping or whatever. This makes no sense. They also tell how I was better when I was a lot younger than now, which isn't true. I always behaved like this and kept thoughts about behaving like this for years. I also speak to myself at home every day and this occurred ever since I was born. I don't do this in public and whenever I do it at home, my family always asks me "to whom I am talking to?" I always interrupt whenever they ask me this or whenever they come nearby me. Then I keep doing this after they leave me alone. Not only I talk to myself, I talk as in I'm talking to someone else and remain my focus on that, usually when I walk around my room, which is a complete mess, but I personally don't care about anything that's happening in my family anymore. In fact, I never did.

then you in real life do not show your good side
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